You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
wow bdsm is so cute
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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