sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
Randomize
