all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
