didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
