I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
It's shark week go big or go home
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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