plz talk dirty to me
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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