how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
