Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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