what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Randomize
