my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
