Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I just gift wrapped bread.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
