He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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