what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize