you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
