and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
There's always time for handjobs
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
