my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Randomize
