you traded sex for a burrito?
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Randomize