Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
