Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Randomize