using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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