youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Randomize