the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
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