he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
