Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize