Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
where does the pee come out of this thing
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
