Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
