FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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