gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
He's on the porch naked. Help.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
