I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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