So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
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