so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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