Where did you get a picture of my penis
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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