i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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