well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
