Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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