He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
