You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
