My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
