people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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