Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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