So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
it's great music for shaving your balls
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize