So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
