But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize