dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
they're like a gay fantastic four
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
