If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I just want to make out with him forever
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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