Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
