Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
