no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
