Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
