Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
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